Toddlers On The Loose
This is a question I received from a subscriber recently:
Hi Alice, Listen, my 2 1/2 year old daughter still runs from
me constantly when outside playing and even ran out in the
road recently. I have done everything I can think of to
explain the dangers to her and cannot get it through her
head. She will not stop when I say stop and I keep thinking
if I do this over and over and over that it will someday
sink in. I am just terribly worried about her safety and
sometimes just keep her inside to keep from worrying, but I
want her to play and have a well rounded life. Please help?
Christy
Argh! I hear you. Nathan is the same age and I have the same problem. In fact, tonight he ran out into a parking lot after we finished some Christmas shopping. I am not sure what advice to give, except I keep my stroller in the car at all times and strap him in when we're walking around (not sure why I didn't do that tonight!).
As far as going outside and playing, I always seek out the playgrounds and play areas that are fenced in. There are a few parks in the area or we sometimes go to our local zoo which is set up for roaming toddlers very well. For indoor activities, our local Parks & Recreation Department has a program called "Roaming Rascals" and they just fill a gym up with toys that kids would like to play with. It costs less than $2 each time we go and the boys love it. Perhaps you might have a similar program in your area.
But that doesn't solve your problem. You want your child to understand that she shouldn't run away like that, but from my experience, it's just what kids do at that age and we have to watch them like hawks. However, if any mom is reading this and has a good solution, I'd LOVE to hear it! Thanks for sharing.
Hi Alice, Listen, my 2 1/2 year old daughter still runs from
me constantly when outside playing and even ran out in the
road recently. I have done everything I can think of to
explain the dangers to her and cannot get it through her
head. She will not stop when I say stop and I keep thinking
if I do this over and over and over that it will someday
sink in. I am just terribly worried about her safety and
sometimes just keep her inside to keep from worrying, but I
want her to play and have a well rounded life. Please help?
Christy
Argh! I hear you. Nathan is the same age and I have the same problem. In fact, tonight he ran out into a parking lot after we finished some Christmas shopping. I am not sure what advice to give, except I keep my stroller in the car at all times and strap him in when we're walking around (not sure why I didn't do that tonight!).
As far as going outside and playing, I always seek out the playgrounds and play areas that are fenced in. There are a few parks in the area or we sometimes go to our local zoo which is set up for roaming toddlers very well. For indoor activities, our local Parks & Recreation Department has a program called "Roaming Rascals" and they just fill a gym up with toys that kids would like to play with. It costs less than $2 each time we go and the boys love it. Perhaps you might have a similar program in your area.
But that doesn't solve your problem. You want your child to understand that she shouldn't run away like that, but from my experience, it's just what kids do at that age and we have to watch them like hawks. However, if any mom is reading this and has a good solution, I'd LOVE to hear it! Thanks for sharing.
posted by Alice at 8:07 PM
NEW! 
3 Comments:
I think kids this age don't really understand such an abstract concept as getting hit by a car...something they've never seen, felt or tasted. But what they DO understand is cause and effect. "If I do "X", then Mommy does "X"....EVERY TIME.
So the next time you go outside to play, explain to your child that if they run into the street, you will be going inside immediately for the day. No second chances. When your toddler runs into the road, calmly pick her up and take her in. No explanations, no warnings, no talk talk talk. To your toddler a lot of talk just sounds like "Blahblahblah"...like the parents in Peanuts, remember? :)
Less talk, more action.
My almost 3 year old daugher used to run down the street (we live in a semi-rural area and all the kdis play in the cul-de-sac) away from me. At first I would run after her, threaten, put her in the corner, give warnings, etc...it didn't work. Then I started taking her in and not letting her go back out. She learned fast that Mommy meant what she said!
Another thing...I have heard some Moms say that they showed their young child smashed frogs and possums with their guts hanging out on the road to sound down the concept of getting hit by a car...but that seems pretty macabre and still too abstract for a very young child. For a 5-7 year old it might work though.
I agree with Carrie - action speaks louder then words with little ones. My oldest know the rule when you are outside is "stay in the yard" and recites it when you ask. However, my younger one is much more apt to not know that rule. ;) He has left the yard only to be taken immediately inside. After a few times he realized you really did have to stay in the yard!
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